Your bachelor party in Montreal was epic and it’s time to pack up and head on home. You’ll miss Montreal and you don’t want to forget your incredible weekend. You have souvenirs you think you might want to bring home and show off to the boys who couldn’t make it. These particular souvenirs if found by your girlfriend or wife may bring up some uncomfortable questions.
Bringing back home the wrong items will have you facing an all-out interrogation as if you’re Jimmy Hoffa facing extortion charges by the feds. Your ass will be on the line and the worst thing is your friends will be on the hook too.
You’ll be on trial and the “judge and jury” i.e. your girlfriend will ultimately decide if she will share the evidence of your misbehavior with the other wives or girlfriends. Like a government sting against organized crime whole crew is going down with your ship.
Will you get scolded for weeks to come? Will you be forbidden from seeing your friends anymore? Will that diamond necklace that was too expensive suddenly become an unavoidable expense to appease the judge? Or worst of all, you get dumped or one of your buds gets divorced! Which is both expensive and emotionally draining. All this chaos because you thought bringing particular souvenirs and other items home was a great idea! Here is a little guide of what items/souvenirs not to bring back from your Montreal bachelor Party.
STRIPPERS CLOTHING
You just witnessed the most incredible lesbian show you have ever seen during your Strip House experience and the whole crew has smiles ear to ear. The beautiful strippers are wrapping up and getting dressed so they can leave your hotel room. You get the crazy idea of buying their sexy bras and panties.
The strippers won’t mind overcharging you and making you pay way over what their panties are worth. We will call it an impulse buy because you horny as fuck and the liquor has clouded your judgment. Who knows maybe it’s one of your fetishes and you fall into the category Bromidrophilia where individuals are aroused by sniffing underwear?
You have your prize and in a drunken stupor, you throw the panties at the bottom of your luggage. The trip is done and when you go home, you completely forget you had the panties in your luggage. You are about to remember real quick you bought those panties when your girlfriend dangles them on her fingers in front of you because they were in your laundry.
Bringing back any form of stripper wear is the dumbest thing you can do. There is no amount of explaining that you can provide that will get you out of this debacle. First of all, your lover has no clue the panties in question belong to a stripper you didn’t even touch. She will think the worst of you and believe they belonged to some broad you picked up in one of Montreal’s nightclubs.
Even if you can convince her you didn’t cheat on her, how are you going to explain wanting a stripper’s used set of panties and bra? She’ll think you’re a liar and the rest of the world will think you’re an idiot. Some things are best remembered in your thoughts, so skip bringing back the stripper’s clothes as a memento!
PICTURES
Social media has changed the name of the game, especially when you want to keep things very close to the chest. There will always be someone in your group including yourself who can’t help taking pictures to capture whatever moment is unfolding in front of you. Yes, all our strippers are picture perfect, but you aren’t allowed to snap photos of their performances.
This rule applies to our Strip House Experience and Strip Club Experience. Snapping photos of strippers will get you slapped and thrown out real fast. If you manage to take a picture and don’t get caught, that picture is trouble in your pocket.
When alcohol is at play you might forget you even took that picture or even worse you decided to share it on snapchat and may have included sending it to the wrong person, like your wife. The snapchat photo will disappear, but your wife won’t.
You’ll get chewed up for sure and have to convince her you didn’t fool around behind her back. Taking pictures at a bachelor is a risky affair that only the wise can handle which pretty much eliminates all your horny crew!
Taking these pictures home on your phone or sharing them on social media is a disaster waiting to happen. If you do keep naughty pictures on your phone, you better have the files in a secure folder that requires a password. You never know when you might be showing off your camera roll and you forget to delete that picture of the bachelor sandwiched between a pair of ass cheeks.
If you want to avoid this kind of trouble, live in the moment and enjoy what’s happening around with your own eyes and not through the lens of a camera.
If you have to take pictures, be sure to take safe group pictures before the party really gets going or at your daytime activities throwing axes. Montreal is a beautiful city, take pictures of that and simply remember all the babes you crossed paths with.
WEED
Weed is legal in Canada but unfortunately that is not the case for our friends south of the border yet. I know it’s going to be really hard not bringing back some of the best marijuana you have ever smoked but you have no choice.
It doesn’t matter if the state you’re from decriminalized cannabis, it is illegal to cross the border with any weed whatsoever. Flying or driving across the border makes no difference when it comes to bringing weed over.
You will risk getting huge fines and depending on how much weed you are caught with you can even go jail. Trust me I watched OZ and you don’t want to go to jail unless you want a horny inmate claiming your ass. The solution is simple: either buy less pot or smoke all of it before you go. You won’t be wasting your money and eliminating the risk of getting arrested either.
Worst case scenario you’ll have to throw away that precious Kush. How about giving the pot to a busker or homeless guy too, consider it a good deed that keeps you out of prison. Do not take the chance of hiding the pot somewhere you deem safe because you’re playing the lottery with your friends’ lives and your own too. If you are driving everyone in the vehicle will be held liable in the eyes of the law even if it is or not your pot. Please just get high and leave the weed in Montreal.
